Know your Boundaries

• Boundaries should be based on your values or the things that are important to you.
• Your boundaries are yours and yours alone.  Many of your boundaries might align with those who are close to you, others will be unique.
• Knowing your boundaries before entering a situation will make you less likely to do something you are not comfortable with.

What to Say

You always have the right to say ‘no’.  When doing so express yourself clearly so there is no doubt about what you want.  Examples include….

“I’m not comfortable with this”

“Please don’t do that”

“Not at this time”

“I don’t want to do that”

“This is not acceptable”

“I have decided not to”

What to Do

Use Confident Body Language – Use eye contact, face the other person, use an assertive tone

Be Respectful – Avoid yelling, avoid demeaning behaviour.  It’s OK to be firm but the message is better received if you are respectful.

Plan Ahead – Think about what you want to say and how you will say it before entering into a difficult situation to enable you to feel more confident.

Compromise – When appropriate, listen and consider the needs of the other person.  You don’t ‘have’ to compromise however doing so is part of a healthy relationship.

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